I have confidence in sunshine
I have confidence in rain
I have confidence that spring will come again
Besides which you see I have confidence in me
I wish I could be as confident as Maria in The Sound of Music. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes I am. But most of the time – at least lately – I feel like I’m not. Yes, part of it is my top secret ambition, but that’s not even half of it. I’ve got so many people on so many sides suggesting what I should do that it’s hard to focus on what I actually want. They think they’re helping, but they’re not. It’s driving me crazy.
I know exactly how Alice Cullen felt. It’s not a bad thing that I identify with her. I’m actually proud of it. But it’s not helping my confidence at all right now because no one seems to want to hear about my dream job. They seem to think “setting things in stone” is a bad idea. While I understand where they are coming from and I know that things can change, I also think it’s important to have goals. And being that my dream job hasn’t changed in approximately eight years, I think it’s going to stick around.
I just wish I had the confidence to tune everyone else out – or at least not let what they say get to me. But when people criticize me to the point where it is no longer constructive, I can’t let it go easily. It destroys any shreds of confidence I may have.
So yes, I do have confidence in myself, but sometimes it’s really fragile.